Red On White
There's some sort of corollary to Murphy, I'm sure, where it states something along the lines of:
if you're eating anything with a rich, red meat sauce, that sauce will be irresistably attracted to whatever portions of white can be found on your clothing.
So imagine my horror and disbelief last night as we are prepping a rather sumptuous-looking meat sauces with fetuccini noodles, and I look down to discover...my shirt is perfectly white.
"Good lord!" I exclaimed, "The sauce will be all over my shirt for certain, and this is one of the only white shirts I have! I need this for work!"
And so I stripped it off.
Ha ha, there will be no evil sauce staining my good, white shirt tonight, I thought. Mel certainly wasn't objecting either: there's something about seeing her husband go topless that gets her grinning.
So, a potential disaster was averted. Until...
"Good lord!" I exclaimed a few moments later, "I forgot! My pants are white too! These are good pants! In fact, they're one of the only three pairs of pants I have! I can't let the sauce get on them too!"
And so I stripped my pants off too.
Ha ha, there will be no evil sauce staining neither my shirt nor my good, white pants, I thought. Of course, Mel's smile had broadened, since now I was clad only in my boxer shorts. There's something about near-nekkid Chaos that gets her grinning wickedly.
So, yet another potential disaster was averted. Until...
"Good lord!" I exclaimed a few moments later, "My boxer shorts are white too! What the hell, is everything I'm wearing today a tone of white?!"
Most of you are probably smacking your foreheads, thinking: Oh no, he's not going to tell us he ate dinner naked, is he?
And no, I didn't. I ate it in my boxers, much to Mel's delight. I was just rather careful to ensure I didn't spill on a good pair of white, Megatokyo "PH34R MY L33T N3KK1D SK1LLZ!" boxer shorts.
Which I suppose is just as well. upon closer inspection, I discovered that I was in fact quite the white boy. Not just caucasian, but horribly pale thanks to being stuck indoors most of the time the sun is out. And as we all know, meat sauce stains on white, even pale white skin, are a pain to clean off.
Today's Lesson: it's spelled f-e-t-u-c-c-i-n-i, despite such a spelling looking so peculiar.
posted by Phillip at 7:17 PM
